[_two rules_] AN ALDERMAN H²AS taken his Degree in Cheating, and the higheſt of his Faculty ; or paid for refuſing his _MANDAMUS_. He is a Peer of the City, and a Member of their upper Houſe, Who, as ſoon as he arrives at ſo many thouſand Pounds, is bound by the Charter to ſerve the Public with ſo much Underſtanding, what ſhift ſoever he make to raiſe it, and wear a Chain about his Neck like a Raindeer, or in Default to commute, and make Satisfaction in ready Money, the beſt Reaſon of the Place; for which hi has the Name only, like a titular Prince, and is an _Alderman extraordinary_. But if his Wife can prevail with him to ſtand, he becomes one of the City-ſupporters, and, like the Unicorn in the King's Arms, wears a Chain about his Neck very right-worſhipfully. He wears Scarlet, as the Whore of _Babylon_ does, not for her honeſty, but the Rank and Quality ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ſhe is of among the Wicked, When he ſits as a Judge in his Court he is abſolute, and uſes arbitrary Power ; for he is not bound to un- derſtand what he does, nor render an Account why he gives Judgment on one Side rather than another ; but his Will is ſufficient to ſtand for his Reaſon, to all Intents and Purpoſes. He does no public Buſineſs without eating and drinking, and never meets about Matters of Im- portance, but the Cramming his Inſide is the moſt weighty Part of the Work of the Day. He diſpatches no public Affair until he has thoroughly dined upon it, and is fully ſatisfied with Quince-Pye and Cuſtard : for Men are wiſer, the _Italians_ ſay, after their Bellies are full, than when they are faſting, and he is very cautious to omit no Occaſion of improving his Parts that Way. He is ſo careful of the In- tereſt of his Belly, and manages it ſo induſ- triouſly, that in a little Space it grows great and takes Place of all the reſt of his Members, and becomes ſo powerful, that they will never be in a Condition to rebel againſt it any more. He is cloathed in Scarlet the Livery of his Sins, like the rich Glutton, to put him in Mind of what Means he came to his Wealth and Pre- ferment by. He makes a Trade of his Eat- ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ing, and, like a Cock, ſcrapes when he feeds ; for the Public pays for all and more, which he and his Brethren ſhare among themſelves ; for they never make a dry Reckoning. When he comes to be Lord-Mayor he does not keep a great Houſe, but a very great Houſe-warming for a whole Year ; for though he invites all the _Companies_ in the City he does not treat them, but they club to entertain him, and pay the Reckoning beforehand. His Fur-gown makes him look a great deal bigger than he is, like the Feathers of an Owl, and when he pulls it off, he looks as if he were fallen away, or like a Rabbet, had his Skin pulled off. ------------------------------------------------------------------------